Are You the Black Sheep?April 1, 2022
Being the odd person out can be an uncomfortable and lonely experience. Unfortunately, it is common for many to feel like their true selves do not mesh with their loved ones. Whether the dissonance results from differences in religious beliefs, morals, or general behavior, the resulting discomfort is nothing to shrug off. So, what do you do if you are the black sheep in your family or friend group? Read on for some tips on how to navigate your relationships for the most positive changes and outcomes.
How Can You Tell That You Are a Black Sheep?
It isn't easy to identify as an outsider. However, do not think that this means there is something wrong with you. Instead, understand that there is something wrong with the way your energy is meshing with other people's energy. If being excluded from shared outings or negative attention always comes your way, then you might be caught in a pattern of being deemed as the black sheep.
These patterns aren't always cut and dry. Maybe you are invited to the family reunion; however, you find that people avoid eye contact. You could also be the recipient of a compliment but later find out it was ill-intentioned. Be aware as possible of your interactions with troublesome loved ones.
How Do You Handle It?
Everyone's circumstances are unique. The end goal, however, should always be the same. If you are the black sheep, know your value and learn to understand that there will be people in your life who do not like you. The fact that some may not understand who you are should not solely be a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of who they are as well. So, how do you heal from the disconnections you might face?
1. Find Your Chosen Family: We cannot choose our blood family; however, there is a chosen family that we have the freedom to create and mutually accept. If you are not getting along with the family you grew up with, invest in people that are there because they want to be. Center the relationships that make you feel good instead of those that leave you drained and uncertain.
2. Think About the Negatives, Positively: Our lives are full of both positive and negative moments. The extremes of both sides make us who we are. Our negative experiences do not always have to make us feel bad—they can turn into positive lessons we can grow from. Reframe those difficult moments and turn them into a future of great memories.
3. Be Authentic: When those that we love and like don't return our sentiments, it can be tempting to change who we are for them. However, when you heal from being the black sheep, do not let these experiences force you into change, but rather stay solid and true to yourself. Be who you are, unapologetically.
How will you remember your value and uniqueness? You are more powerful than you think. Do not let your status as the black sheep take you down a path away from yourself!