Dealing with Dating Anxiety

Even under the best, most ideal circumstances, dating can be a minefield of awkward encounters and doubt. Throw in some good, old-fashioned anxiety and you have a situation that can explode at any moment. However, unless you want to spend the rest of your days alone, dating is a reality that you will have to face. Finding ways to deal with dating anxiety can help you embrace the experience and enjoy the process—or at least be able to laugh off the truly disastrous dates.

Anxiety Buster #1: Imbibe Carefully, If At All

Remember, alcohol can be a double-edge sword. Just as it can be used a social lubricant to make you more comfortable, it can work too well. If you drink a little too much, you might say or do things that you regret the next day. Alcohol is also a depressant and an unfortunate side effect of your hangover can be an increase in anxiety—just the thing you were trying to reduce.

Anxiety Buster #2: Burn Calories Before Meeting

Get out there and exercise before your big date. It’s not about toning up or losing weight, but more about releasing powerful endorphins and feel-good hormones that will help you be your most confident and charming self. Exercise also gives your body a release and may help relieve anxiety shows, such as trembling. And if all that isn’t enough to convince you, it’ll give you one more talking point that you can keep in your pocket.

Anxiety Buster #3: Get Busy on the First Date

Instead of gazing into each other’s eyes and sharing intimate details of your life over a fancy dinner, try a date that revolves around a fun activity. It can be anything from bowling or mini golf to a walking tour of the city. Planning an active first date can help reduce anxiety by giving you an activity to focus on to help relieve the pressure and intensity that often accompanies first dates.

Anxiety Buster #4: Indulge Your Curiosity

Take deep calming breaths throughout your date. This will help you calm and center yourself. When you feel calm and centered, let yourself indulge your curiosity. Dating is about meeting new people. By keeping an open mind and being curious about your date, you might surprise yourself and find yourself getting along with someone you never expected.

Anxiety Buster #5: Come Clean

It’s natural to be nervous on the first date and chances are good that your date is nervous too. If it all gets to be too much for you, or you suddenly find yourself rambling, it’s okay to admit it and come clean that you’re nervous and fighting off anxiety. You never know, your date might appreciate your honesty. Just remember, you can come clean about it and move on to the next topic. Don’t try to dwell on it. And if they don’t understand, you don’t want to date them anyways.

Try out these tips on your next date and find what techniques work best for you. The most important thing for you to remember when dealing with dating anxiety is that you aren’t alone and you don’t have to be.